These are just some random funny quotes that make me smile/laugh. There aren't any real spoilers down there, but here's a list of the books that these quotes are from: The Titan's Curse, Paper Towns, City of Bones, City of Glass, Name of the Star, Changeless, The Lightning Thief, Darker Still, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, and Half-Blood Prince.
Favorite Quotes From Books(Humor/Funny):
“Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
"Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."
I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand."
"I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
"And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt.”
Rick Riordan, The Titan's Curse
Radar threw his books into his locker and shut it. Then the din of conversation around us quieted just as a bit as he turned his eyes towards the heavens and shouted, "IT'S NOT MY FAULT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLLECTION OF BLACK SANTAS!"
John Green, Paper Towns
"Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me."
Cassandra Clare, City of Bones
"Patient, grasshopper," said Maia. "Good things come to those who wait."
"I always thought it was 'good things come to those who do the wave,'" said Simon. "No wonder I've been so confused all my life."
Cassandra Clare, City of Glass
Welsh is actual, currently used language and our next-door neighbors Angela and Gaenor spoke it. It sounds like Wizard.
Maureen Johnson, The Name of the Star
"Alexia," she hissed to her friend, "there are knees positively everywhere. What do I do?"
Gail Carriger, Changeless
"How did you die?"
"We, er... drowned in a bathtub."
"All three of you?"
"it was a big bathtub."
"it was a big bathtub."
Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief
"Coffee first. Schemes later."
Leanna Renee Hieber, Darker Still
(I feel like this should always be true).
"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."
Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
"Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?"
"Yes," said Harry stiffly
"There's no need to call me 'sir,' Professor." The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying.
J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
These aren't in any specific order and they're probably not all my favorite, favorite. I can think of tons more that I love, but these are the random ones I found going through the ones I'm 'liked' on Goodreads. (These are all from Goodreads, by the way, so if there's anything wrong with them, I'm truly sorry). Also, I haven't actually read the Restaurant at the End of the Universe yet, so there's that. Anyway, if you did a Top Ten Tuesday today or whenever, feel free to link me in the comments, I love theses kinds of things!